Who doesn't love to get dressed up and take into the big event in downtown? I love parties as long as there's something going on. Nothing is worse than heading to a party which supposed to be great but ends up to be dead.
I enjoy small places like Zoo-bar in London at Leicester Square, where you can take a few drinks before heading to Ministry of Sound later on and let the beat hammer throw your body with some of the best DJ's in the world.
But nothing beats live music when it's the best, who wouldn't love to take to Whiskey a go go on Sunset Boulevard in Los Angeles? That old, worlds most famous live-club where The Doors played decades ago. Or the Wiper Room on the Strip as well, with all those raising stars.
Then there's those more exclusive clubs like Marquee on 10 th. street in NewYork, which is a very chic and classy nightclub you really got to get dressed up. Of course with separate VIP area for those who's got cash...
I need to confess, that even though I've been in summer festivals when I was younger, I won't do it anymore. Living in a tent, without having toilets or bath on my own. Living in the middle of some urin smelling field with thousands of others. No, that's not me. I still take to festivals, but only for one day, or to see some particular band. If that's the case, I've been there as a VIP so I don't need to be on that messy side of the fence.
Well, I love parties if they're working. If there's boring in there, I'm usually creating something to take the party into next level. If that's not good enough, I'm off.
Rain... I'll try to be positive even though I hate rain. I'm taking my Hunter boots on, packing my laptop with me and heading up to the cafe close the harbour.
I'm so tired, didn't sleep much last night. I'm ordering an expresso though normally cafe latte would be fine. I'm looking all those busy people on the street running around hiding under their umbrellas. I'm not busy, just tired of this city. I need a change of an environment, I want to travel and see the rest of the world.
When you travel a lot, you can see that the world isn't that huge anyway. I've taken around a few times and done some crazy stuff. I miss the waves in Hawaii, Skydiving on Fiji Islands, playing superstar in Hollywood, romantic dinners at Niagara falls in Canada, nature in New Zealand, my family and friends in Melbourne and Sydney in Australia. Tokyo is also a pretty hip city with their fashion coulture. Not talk about NewYork with all the shopping in the 5.th Avenue...And Europe is been seen throw. I just love this world, experience of new places, and I can't wait to get to South Africa in february where I'll dive with the great white sharks in Cape Town.
I woke up of my daydreaming, looking out of the window. It's not raining anymore. The sun is shinning again and it makes me to smile.
You have to be me to understand. All I can breath is your life and I'm sick of it. I love but I hate you. I trust but I don't believe in you. I care but I don't give a damn. People are afraid of change. I'm afraid that things will never change. I have my dreams, I just don't know if you are part of them yet.
No emty promises. They just hurt too much. You never know about life. We don't care about the past. We don't know about tomorrow. Love me now, today.
Somewhere, far away, lives my heart still flying free in the wind, trusting, believing, loving. Somewhere out there it still trusts people, believes the future and continues loving the world, even though I always don't.
Who am I? what am I? Stranger in my body. Who am I? What am I? When I'll learn to know myself? I can't fight the tears that ain't coming. I'm confused. Only this closed room. These painful feelings. Only loneliness and sadness. Life without a destination.
I know the magic words. I've always known how to choose my words to get what I want. Well, I knew we had played that game long enough to know there was something in there. You undressed me with your eyes already long time ago. And then, that summer night you suddenly stood there, right in front of me. My body was in fire.
I was speechless. I was weak, lost control in that summer heat and took you into my deepest fantasies. Even the Gods in heaven stayed quiet when we became one. If it only was that night we owned, even if it didn't last, it was still the greatest ever. Addiction. We just couldn't get enouh of each other.
The price was just too high. Sad, but sometimes you have to give up something, because you have too much to lose. You've seen me. I'll never forget...
Angel. Age 14 and half. Taking for one of those stupid teenage adventures alone. Sitting in a bus across the Europe finding myself in England. I'm free, no one giving me orders or telling me what not to do. I just do whatever I want. No limits.
Taking into clubs in London with my fake id. Playing an adult, pretending to be something I'm not.Getting really waisted, hanging around with some people I don't know. I feel like the queen of the night...
Waking up in early next morning. All the innocence just gone in one night. I know I said no, but it doesn't matter anymore. The whole body is in ruin. Nothing left of that child I used to be.
It's one of the big issues of the day: I don't know what to wear. I'm trying similar sets of clothing over and over again...Everytime it all ends up to one simple answer: I have nothing to wear!
I guess the most of you know what I'm talking about, but in my case it can be extreme. I mean if we'll take an example as shoes: I have stopped counting them 'cause they're everywhere. I'm not lying saying it might be at least up to 180 pairs. Christian Louboutins, Jimmy Choos, Pradas, Guccis...I could just keep going.
We are only talking about shoes. Thinking about my designer bags as well. I have offered a fortune to them and as Samantha from Sex and the city says: "It's not a handbag. It's a fucking Birkin!" There's many people who doesn't understand me using like 7000$ for a bag and I'm fine with it. For me it's a passion, a lifestyle. But as everybody knows: Fashions fade but style is eternal. You have to know how the trends are changing. Everytime I find something new and ordered it home, people are starring at me like I'm a freak. I just keep telling them to wait 6 months and it'll be seen everywhere, but that time I've already moved on to the next level.
Well, as I said I'm trying hundreds sets of clothing and it should be just something simple and casual...Well, It'll be just jeans, t-shirt from DKNY, black leather jacket, black vintage sandals from Prada. Then I'll pick my favourite shades from Chanel, black tote from Chanel as well. Finally: I'm ready to go.
This endless torture. This painless pleasure...
I'm sad. Everything you say is wrong. All I hear is what I want to hear. Shhhh. Don't speak, listen. Silence. All I can hear is my own heartbeat. Can you feel it?
I'm dreaming. Dreaming of you being here with me. You're so close but so far away. I need you to fight away my fears and being there for me.
I'd like to take your hand and tell you I was wrong, but I won't do it. I'll take everything but I don't give anything. I'm selfish. A bitch. I'm treating you as a piece of shit, but expecting you to treat me like a princess. I'd like to say I'm sorry, but i won't do it. Picking up the fight, over and over again.
How can you still be there for me? Maybe there's something in me what only you can see. Something you find worth of fighting for. I'm happy you to be there, even if I don't deserve it...
But nothing beats live music when it's the best, who wouldn't love to take to Whiskey a go go on Sunset Boulevard in Los Angeles? That old, worlds most famous live-club where The Doors played decades ago. Or the Wiper Room on the Strip as well, with all those raising stars.
